Kristi Woods

Encouraging Women to Walk Deeper with God

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YourStory: Debbie McDaniel

April 4, 2017 by Kristi 16 Comments

 

God Can Bring Beauty from the Greatest Struggles:

No Matter What We Face, He Crowns Our Lives with Good, He Will Never Waste Our Pain

By Debbie McDaniel

 

She came downstairs early one morning, bleary eyed, wearing her favorite kitty cat pajamas, sparkly princess tiara sitting on top of tousled, tangled hair. She cuddled up next to me, and smiled, “Mom, just because your hair’s messy, doesn’t mean you can’t still wear a crown.” 🙂

Ahh, so true. And not only for a sweet 7 year-old girl who just rolled out of bed and plopped a sparkly tiara on her head. But for you. For me.

Just because life is messy, doesn’t mean we can’t still wear a crown. Because of whose we are.

 

Just because life is messy, doesn't mean we can't still wear a crown. Because of whose we are. ~@DebbMcDaniel Click To Tweet

 

We are children of the King. He crowns our lives with good. He crowns our lives with purpose. He crowns our lives with beauty.

Even in the midst of things that look messy, the most difficult of days, or every dull, ordinary moment, He causes light still to shine. In the struggles and all. We may not see it. We might forget it’s there.

Life tangled and tousled. Mess of struggle and cares. Yet, no matter what it all looks like or how bleak the future feels, the truth is this: we still wear His crown.

And it’s often in our darkest, that God’s power shines the brightest.

 

 

For greatest beauty is often formed in dark places.

Many times we want to shine without the pain and uncertainty of what the hard stuff brings. We long to reflect beauty without the glaring weakness of deep cracks that line our stories and fill us with holes. We want to cover what was broken and scarred, masking the struggles of a past that took us down difficult pathways. And yet, embracing the beauty of the broken is what enables us to live free.

Really free.

With greater purpose. Changed hearts. Renewed focus and vision.

I became acquainted with the clutches of grief through the first few years of a journey through infertility. We walked that path much longer than we wanted, it often seemed more like a crawl, and became slower than we ever dreamed we’d have to endure. 7 years. Of many tears. And lonely suffering of the heart.

When my husband and I had married, we often talked about having a house full of kids. He was a Children’s Pastor, I worked as a Pediatric nurse. We both loved children, loved God, and dreamed of having a large family. But we had never dreamed of this…a long road of uncertainty through infertility, unanswered questions, doctor’s appointments, grief, and pain. It just didn’t make sense. Why would God allow that to happen? What good could ever come from it? It seemed cruel. Like some kind of a twisted joke.

Over the years, I’d watched so many of my friends and family get pregnant, start families, then even get pregnant again, with their second baby. Mother’s Day and other holidays were often brutal, filled with many tears and heartache. I’d try to be happy, stay hopeful, but inside I felt crushed, and struggled with deep despair. The enemy worked overtime. He loves to kick us while we’re down, and he’s great at filling our minds with lies and fear, that we’re somehow “less than,” that we don’t measure up, or that we’re broken, alone, and unloved.

Over time, we sensed God’s strong pull towards adoption. Surely, we thought, this was His plan all along. And we waited for everything to fall into place. Nicely. Neatly. Yet our excitement soon waned with more waiting, more heartbreak, as we then trudged through 2 failed adoptions.

I desperately wanted off that path rooted with potholes and weeds. I stumbled often, and sometimes lost steam…I will never forget. I remember still. How slow it all seemed.

I was angry with God for many months. Even years. I couldn’t understand what He was doing. But no matter how distant I’d grow, His grace was still there, so faithful, so secure. He would often remind me that neither my anger, feelings, nor my questions, could ever determine or dictate how much He really loved or cared. Because it wasn’t based on me, it was based on Him, His character. And God can’t help but to love His children, and bless our lives with good, even straight through the hardest places. Nothing we can do can ever stop Him. He is never taken off guard by our emotions, He understands our pain before the tears even roll down our cheeks. And His heart is ever toward us, and His ears are open to our cries.

 

His heart is ever toward us...His ears are open to our cries. ~ @DebbMcDaniel Click To Tweet

 

It’s been years now, since that time. We have 3 precious children that God graced our lives with through the gift of adoption. Our oldest is 15, then 11, then 10. And every day I look into the sweet faces, and I recognize God’s Sovereignty and plan. I’m reminded how the dark seasons really do bring so much good, stronger faith, deeper character, great blessings, more than what the pleasant places could ever bring.

In case you need a reminder today, if you’ve been left feeling forgotten, wounded, or battle-weary from the trials and struggles of this life, be assured, you’re not alone. Not ever. In the midst of all you face, God sees you, He’s with you. You wear a sparkling crown that says, “redeemed,” “restored,” “set free,” “chosen,” “set apart.” He’s put it there, it’s secure and shining, and nothing can ever take it away. It stays firmly in place, even among hard times and messy days.

And that gives us the power we need to press on – scars, struggles, messy lives and whatever that brings – into all of our tomorrows.

He will never waste the pain we’ve walked through in this life, but will turn it around for good. He promises. And He is able to do more than we could ever imagine, even through every season of brokenness.

Keep moving forward in His grace and strength my friends. He has more still in store, such purpose and hope…for you.

 

“…like the jewels of a crown they shall shine on his land.” Zechariah 9:16 ESV

 

“To bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.” Is 61:3 NIV

 

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

 

 

Debbie McDaniel is a pastor’s wife and mom to 3, who loves good stories, good coffee, and every sunrise. She’s a writer for sites such as Crosswalk and iBelieve.com, and would love the chance to connect with you on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or at www.debbiemcdaniel.com.

 

Linking with other Jesus writers here: #raralinkup, #testimonyTuesday, #heartencouragementThursday, #chasingcommunity. 
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How Do We Handle Envy? A Round Table Discussion {Part 2 of 4}

March 29, 2017 by Kristi 20 Comments

 

Welcome back to “A Round Table Discussion”!

Our conversation highlights envy this week – how to battle it well. Abby McDonald, Lisa Appelo, Tiffany Parry, Betsy de Cruz, and Kristine Brown are joining us as we throw the covers off envy. After all, it’s a temptation most of us face. Why not talk about how to conquer it effectively?

 

 

Find part 1 of 4 here. 

 

Let’s grab our seat at A Round Table and continue the discussion today.

 

3. Have you encountered envy?

Lisa Appelo: Pick a day, any day. I think we’re so used to envious impulses we don’t even realize how often they happen. Facebook and Instagram have only escalated the trippers because we now have constant windows into our friends’ lives and homes. I’m often hit with a double whammy – first the depressing effects of envy and then the guilt from realizing I’m envious. The guilt is especially bad when I realize I’ve envied a dear friend.

 

Kristine Brown: Even though I know everyone has encountered envy, it still feels icky to reveal my envious thoughts. Envy can attack every area of our lives. Reliationships, work, even ministry.

Not long ago my husband and I pastored a small church in our community. God blessed us with a loving congregation, outstanding facilities, and a vision for outreach. But when other churches in town thrived, I battled that spirit of envy. If someone left our church to attend another, I took it as a personal failure.

It’s oh-so-hard to admit that. Envy crept in undetected and caused me to doubt my calling. I wrote more about that struggle in an article for women leaders.com. 

Once I became aware of the envy and identified it for what it was – a lie from the enemy – I could look to God’s word for the answer.

 

Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life.

Pr. 4:23 WEB

 

Kristi Woods: I once found myself envious of an author who crossed the publication line before me. I was knee-deep in a manuscript, trying diligently to get to the finish line. When I saw their success, I immediately looked at my own supposed failure. The struggle with envy became real – and ugly – and fast!

In the midst of the battle, the Lord spoke something to the tune of this: Who are you to be upset if I’ve chosen them to do my work? There are lives on the other end of this book, waiting to be touched for eternal purposes – lives at stake. Isn’t it worth it? Look at the bigger ministry picture.

Those words shook me awake. I began praying in earnest – for forgiveness, for the author, the book, and for the audience.

 

Set a heart guard against envy. Be determined. Click To Tweet

 

4. Warning Signs of Envy

Tiffany Parry: We’ve all experienced this odd tension. Someone we know wins the prize, their talent is seen and recognized, and in our heart [hopefully] we want to be thrilled for their success. Maybe we’ll even go on to celebrate them. But behind those three cheers lies that nagging question … why them and not me?

 

Why them and not me? - @TiffParry Join us - #roundtable discussion on envy. Click To Tweet

 

We can take that question to Jesus and submit to the truth that His plans for us are perfectly timed, or we can let that question plague us. I think that’s when envy takes root – when “them and not me” spirals into bitterness, anger, and even division. Even more dangerous is when we allow those unbalanced emotions, rather than God’s truth, dictate our words and actions.

The correction: return to Jesus. When envy tension creeps up, lean into the truth that your worth is measured by Jesus, not someone else’s success. He’s big enough to dictate the celebration He’s designed just for you.

 

Kristi Woods: I agree, Tiffany. Our God has individual, not cookie-cutter, plans for each of us. Why compare?

Envy looks like a tense mess in me, although you likely won’t see one bit of it. It happens behind the scenes, in the dark corners of my thoughts. An internal glare and banter begins about “that person.” An invisible wall begins to build between me and them. Inevitably, I feel “less than,” and sometimes discouragement sets it. It becomes more about me and less about Him. It’s rooted in selfishness, in pride. Wow – it feels ugly to offer that, but it’s true.

The Lord is faithful to show us how to recognize and squelch the banter when it’s birthed. As we grow in Christ and resolve to not let it take hold, we quiet envy’s voice at the onset and bring glory to God. I’m proof He’s trustworthy in this.

 

 

Action Step: What warning signs does envy offer you? Comment below. We’d love to hear your thoughts.

 

A Prayer for Road ~

Lord, You are good. You are faithful, and Your word is true. Show me how to guard my heart against envy, good Father. Open my eyes to its reach. May You gain the glory as it’s removed, and may love fill envy’s void. I’m Your vessel, Lord. Use me how You will. In Jesus’ name, amen. 

 

Join us tomorrow for part 3. Until then, guard your heart well, friend.

Linking with other Jesus writers here: #coffeeforyourHeart. 
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Welcome


Welcome! I’m Kristi. And you are…?

Glad to meet you, new friend of faith.

Feel free to pull up a chair, make yourself feel at home. This is “our” space to be real, to grow in faith, and to walk deeper with God.

Be forewarned, however. This is a space for Sunday pewsitters becoming Monday through Sunday worshipers – a place where women walk deeper with God.  xo

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