Please welcome Deb Wolfe to the blog today. It’s my joy to introduce you to a woman in the top 10% of the world’s most joyful people. Okay, so I don’t know that for certain, but I do know that a jolt of joy bursts forth from her blog every time I visit. She sees God’s blessing at every turn of life, and her blog and writing exhibit it beautifully. Please help me welcome Deb.
3 Truths to Help You Get Over Your Mom Guilt
Year after year the same dream frequented my nights.
In the dream I lived in a lovely home where life was good. Except for one problem . . . there was always a pet, usually a dog, living in a corner of the basement.
A pet I continually forgot to feed, play with, or take outside.
When I’d remember the pet in the basement, guilt and fear would slap me up the side of the head. Guilt of the things I had failed to do and fear about what I’d find when I went downstairs.
Tired of waking up feeling like a failure before the day began, I asked God to show me what He wanted me to learn from these mental movies reruns.
Have you read Julie Ann Barnhill’s book, Motherhood: the Guilt that Keeps on Giving?
Well, that was the message of my dream. I was reliving my version of mom-guilt and fear night after night.
Can you relate?
I love being a mom. I loved the busy exhausting challenges of the daily with my kiddos. But with that being said . . . I remember feeling like it was never enough, like I should be doing more or better, like I carried my children’s future on my shoulders.
Today my children are grown with children of their own, and I still sometimes feel like I could have and should have done much more.
That’s when the heavenly Father reminds me of three truths.
He reminds me that although it’s true—I was not then, I’m not now, nor will I ever be a perfect mom, there are no perfect mothers. We are simply doing our best as we love our children with all we’ve got.
“Of all things love is the most potent.” –Maria Montessori
Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13
“Making the decision to have a child — it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body.” — Elizabeth Stone
He reminds me that mothering like every other aspect of my life is covered by His grace . . . and His grace is sufficient.
“God’s grace is immeasurable. His mercy is inexhaustible. He peace is inexpressible.” ~Unknown
So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:16
He reminds me that my children and grandchildren are His. I am not perfect nor am I able to make them perfect. As moms we are called to love and guide them by pointing them toward God’s love, grace, and mercy . . . that I can do and you can too.
But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16
A thousand times I’ve failed
Still your mercy remains
Should I stumble again
Still I’m caught in your grace ~Hillsong
It has been a while since I’ve had a “puppy in the basement” dream.
Of course, I still have my mom guilt moments. Sometimes I think they’re pare of our job description. But now I’ve learned to learned to entrust those feelings to God’s grace more quickly. I count on the His loving forgiveness sufficient to cover my many weaknesses.
The next time you have a moment of “mom guilt” remember you are loved and forgiven—your children are loved and forgiven.
Reject the guilt and go hug your kids.
Meet Deb Wolfe ~
Hi! I’m Deb, a Sanguine CLASS trained speaker and writer. I serve in ministry with my husband and best friend, Blake, in St. Louis, Missouri. My favorite past times include sharing my love for and joy in the Lord at Retreats, Conferences, and through my writing.
As a blogging fanatic I write five or more posts a week for various sites. Counting My Blessings is my personal blog where I share Bible studies, devotions, and my thoughts on faith, family, and friendships. You can also find me at the HomeGoods – Design Happy Blog where we share tips and ideas for decorating on a budget; and a few years ago I participated in Woman’s Day – WD Happiness Blog where we talked about ways small changes make a big impact on our happiness.
My first book, Sarah’s Garden, was published in 2008, and encourages girls of all ages to flourish in their God given personalities, gifts, and abilities.
Connect with Deb here:
Linking with other Jesus lovers, and we’d love to have you, here: Intentionally Pursuing, Holley Gerth.
Did You Know?
- Our first author interview publishes next week. I’m super pumped to get hands on her upcoming release, and even more excited that half of the proceeds go to the LA Dream Center. Read more next Tuesday!
- There’s more encouragement awaiting you on Twitter. Tweet! Tweet! 🙂